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funny jokes sms happy birthday marriage wishes anniversary wishes

funny jokes sms happy birthday marriage wishes anniversary wishes

~On this birthday of yours, let’s spoil ourselves with an amazing dinner in a luxurious restaurant & prove everyone how classy we really are!
~~Happy Birthday~~

Congratulations on breaking good 18-year-old single malts by a hefty margin of 7 years.
May you both age even more gracefully in each other’s company.
Happy 25th wedding anniversary!

~Shy people are like a really slow-loading file; most people won’t stick around long enough to get to the awesome content!

Life is too ironic. It takes sadness to know what happiness is, noise to appreciate silence, and absence to value presence.
Good Morning!
And he blocked me. Did I say anything wrong?

There exists a paradise where…
All wives are lovely and all husbands are loving,
All parents are respected and all children are angels,
All holidays are relaxing and all vacations are amazing,
All birthdays are celebrated and all anniversaries are being rejoiced.
That place is called…

~This year, your birthday gathering is going to leave everyone speechless. Happy Birthday to a real master of good taste!


A gardener may water the plant daily but fruits grow only in the season.
Have patience everything is destined to happen at its own time.
Good Morning and have a Nice Weekend!

Research has shown that laughing for 2 minutes is just as healthy as a 20 minutes jog.
So now I sit in the park laughing at all the joggers!

Interviewer: You’re asking a very high salary for someone who has no experience in this field.
Candidate: Well, this job is going to be super hard since I have no idea what I’m doing!

Mom: Ajkal Ke Bachhe Arrange Marriage Pe Vishwas Hi Nahi Karte.
Son: Main Karta Hun Mom.
Mom: Haan Beta, Kyonki Tere Paas Sirf Wahi Ek Option Hai!


~A South Indian couple adopted a kid named Lokesh. They changed his name to Lokeshan.
He drives UBER – ‘Lokeshan has reached your location”!

~If you eat well, get good sleep, exercise and drink plenty of water… you’ll die anyway!

~When she says, “Let me think about it.”
There is 99.9% chance that she has already arrived at ‘No’!

What did the buffalo say to his son when he left?
Bison!

Banta: Why do you like green tea so much?
Santa: Green tea is a good anti-oxidant. It helps to digest ‘Cholle Bhature’ and ‘Lassi’!

What do you call bears with no ears?
B!

A Marwadi gets a heart attack.
Friend: Fortis hospital is nearest, let’s take him there.
Marwadi: Wait, I’m feeling better now!


You know mountains aren’t just funny, they are hill-areas

The difference between beggar and unemployed is one begs from strangers and the latter one begs from known people!

On my birthday, my friend messaged me in short, “HBD HBD HBD”.
So now on his anniversary, I messaged him, “HA HA HA”.

~Your anniversary reminds us of all the things we love about this season – or perhaps one of the very few.
Have a great one!

Eyes can see the future.
Heart believes in it.
The mind works for it.
Soul lives in it!

ਦੁਕਾਲੰ ਪ੍ਰਣਾਸੀ ਦਇਆਲੰ ਸਰੂਪੇ।।
ਸਦਾ ਅੰਗ ਸੰਗੇ ਅਭੰਗੰ ਬਿਭੂਤੇ ।।

You are the Destroyer of hard times & Embodiment of Mercy.
You are Ever present with all, You are the Indestructible & Glorious, O Lord!

Happy birthday to the Cleverest sign of the Zodiac!

~I didn’t miss it by much, did I?
Happy Birthday!

Everyone can take marriage vows but a very few people can keep them forever~~
Happy 25th wedding anniversary!

Never give up on a dream because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.

If you’re struggling, that means you’re progressing.
Good Morning!

Sad News:
My relationship with whisky is on the rocks!

The fundamental difference between me and Sundar Pichai is that –
He works at Google & I Google at work!

Two friends met after so many years. One friend said, “I missed your smile a lot.”
The other friend said, “I missed my own smile a lot without you!”

#femalefoeticide
A girl from India becomes Miss World,
Where most of the girls are made to miss the World!

~Dear God,
Please grant me one more life, because I’ve wasted this one in – ‘Kya Pehnu’ and ‘Kya Khaau’!

~Me: You’re amazing. You always give me what I need and even though you make me pay for it, I love you.
Bartender: That’ll be $13.75.

How do you make an eggroll?
You push it!

How does NASA organize a party?
They planet!

Wishing you the happiness of good friends, the joy of close family and the wonders of the holiday season.
Have a happy and memorable Thanksgiving!

May you be bestowed upon with the best of everything and have the strength to surpass any obstacle. The Lord will lead your way.
Have a blessed Thanksgiving!

ਹਉ ਬਲਿਹਾਰੀ ਸਤਿਗੁਰੂ ਪੂਰੇ।।
ਸਰਣਿ ਕੇ ਦਾਤੇ ਬਚਨ ਕੇ ਸੂਰੇ।।
~Warm Tributes to Guru Teg Bahadur Sahib on His Martyrdom Day!

~Thinking of you on your birthday and hoping that all the happiness you’ve given to others will return to bless you a thousand fold.
Wishing you a Happy Birthday, Dear Friend!

Don’t choose the better person;
Choose the person who makes you better!

We are not given a good life or a bad life. We are given a life. It’s up to us to make it good or bad.
Good Morning!

Santa was staying in a hotel before he went to bed, he phoned down to reception.
“Hi, this is room 319. Can I have a wake-up call, please?”
Receptionist: Yes Sir… you’re in your 50s, overweight and balding, and have achieved nothing in life!

So much protest against Bhansali for distorting history… but no voice raised against South Indian actors for distorting Physics, Chemistry, Biology, Medical Science, Engineering, Logic. etc.

Pappu: Hey Dad, I’m cold.
Santa: Go into the corner.
Pappu: But why?
Santa: Because It’s 90 degrees!

~Behind every “Maine Toh Kuch Nahi Padha Yaar”.
There is hidden, “Tu Hi Fail Hoga Saale, Meri Toh Full Tayari Hai”!

~Note-Bandhi Kya Hui ‘Chillar’ Miss World Jeet Gayi!

~What is a pirate’s favorite letter?
It would be C!

Main Relationship Mein Cheat Nahi Kar Sakta.
Kyonki Uske Liye 2 Ladkiyan Chaiye Hoti Hain Aur Yaha Toh Ek Bhi Nahi Hai!

Just do me a favour,
Put your left hand on your right shoulder & your right hand on your left shoulder.
~Guess what… I just sent you a warm hug!

Leaders don’t create more followers, they create more leaders!
~

Hope is wishing something would happen. Faith is believing something will happen. Courage is making something happen!

Whenever you feel weak, remember the things that made you strong; whenever you start to doubt yourself, remember those who believe in you.
Good Morning and have a Great Day!

~Woh Hamara Online Aana Aur Tumhara Offline Chale Jana,
Uff Tumhari Yeh Digital Nafrat!

~The kids of this generation get marks like this, these days:
99.4,
99.5,
99.8,
99.9.
~The nearest I ever got to these kinds of figures was when I had fever!

~After getting drunk, Bachelor of Technology turns into Master of Philosophy!

~Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There’s no doubt about it.
Anytime you have romance, your wife is bound to interfere!

Banta: Why is Men’s Day not popular as Women’s Day?
Santa: Because we can’t celebrate man’s achievement in a single day!

Roger Federer to an Indian: You people play cricket with tennis balls?
Indian: Yes.
Roger Federer: Then what do you do with your tennis racquets? Indian: We connect batteries to it and kill mosquitoes!

Birthday gifts are just a reward for not dying this year!

~~Marriage is a beautiful investment. The more you put in it, the better the returns.
Happy Silver Wedding Anniversary~~~

~~Beautiful things happen when you distance yourself from negativity!

The 3 Cs in life:

~~Choice, Chance, Change.
You must make the Choice, to take the Chance, if you want anything in life to Change.
Good Morning!

~~At a wedding function:
Aunty: Aur Beta Aage Ka Kya Socha Hai, Kaun Sa Course Lena Hai?
Pappu: Ji Bas Ab Main Course!

~~Ek Hote Hain Talented;
Ek Hote Hain Bahut Zyada Talented;
Phir Aate Hain Khud Single Ho Kar Dusron Ko Relationship Advice Dene Wale~~~

Who doesn’t eat on Thanksgiving?
A turkey because it is always stuffed!

Son: I want to buy a sports bike.
Dad: Tere Dimaag Mein Kuch Akal ‘Hayabusa’ Bhara Hua Hai Bas?

~~Guy: Bhaiya Ek Cigarette Aur Do Vicks Dena.
Paan Wala: Aur Kuchh Chahiye?
Guy: Bas Ek Sanam Chahiye Aashiqui Ke Liye~~~

~~If my mouth doesn’t say it, my face definitely will!

~~The only way to lose weight from green tea is that you pick it yourself from the mountains!

~~Don’t feel bad if someone rejects you. People usually reject expensive things because they can’t afford them!

~~~The brave concept is ‘Do or Die’;
Practical concepts is ‘Do before you Die’;
And winner’s concept is ‘Don’t die, until you do it~~~

~~Don’t lose hope.
You never know what tomorrow will bring.
Good Morning and have a Nice Weekend!

Banta: What should you give a man who has everything?
Santa: A woman to show him how to work it!

What do you use to lure in an arguing fish?
De-bate!

!!I might look as if I am doing nothing, but in my head, I’m quite busy!!!

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